Remember my fun filled interview for Nursing school? So, nearly 30 years later I applied for PA school. Among the requirements was 500 hours of patient contact experience. So, I had worked as an RN for (shockingly enough) 30 years at that point, and had accrued, with overtime, something on the order of 63,000 hours of patient care.
So, I went to interview for the incoming class, and they asked me if I had 500 hours of patient care experience. I had included my resume detailing my schooling and work experience as part of my application, so I assumed that my work history was not a surprise.
I asked, “Do you mean, in the past 3 months? or overall?”
“How about, overall?”
“Well, something like 60,000 plus hours, I guess.”
The reply? “Well, alright then! Let’s move along!”
I succeeded, and so got to deal with the financial aid office.
I filled out the form, complete with the birthdate revealing that I had been born some 50 + years previously. I ignored the part where they sought my parent’s tax forms.
When I turned in my application, the gosling behind the counter reviewed my papers, and looked my elderly ass right in the eye, saying, “You don’t have your father’s tax form in here!”
She sure was quick! “No, ma’am, I do not.”
She was, albeit, persistent. “You have to include your father’s tax forms.”
“Ma’am, I am not going to submit my father’s tax forms. For one thing, he has not filed in 13 years. ”
“He hasn’t filed in 13 years? He has to!”
“Ma’am, perhaps you could call him up, and let him know that. But, it’s going to be kind of a long distance call. And, when you reach him, please tell him that I love him, and miss him every day.”
Perhaps, she was not so quick. “Huh?”
“Ma’am, my father died over a dozen years ago. You will not be receiving his tax forms.”
Undeterred, she demanded, “Well, we will need your mother’s tax forms!”
I was over this. “Ma’am, you are not going to receive my mother’s tax forms, either. She is pushing 80 years old, I have lived on my own for 30 years, and the only tax forms you will receive are those belonging to my wife and me. Perhaps I should talk to your supervisor?”
After several minutes, an adult appeared. I reviewed my position. “Ma’am, this young lady insists on my providing my parents’ tax forms. That is not going to happen. I have supported my own family for nearly a dozen years. I am not about to provide my parents’ forms, nor have they supported me for longer than this nice young lady has been alive.”
The adult looked at me for a moment. “And, you are Mr. McFee, correct? And, you are the student? Not one of your children?”
“Ma’am, if you look at the applicant’s birthday on the application, you will see that it matches my apparent age.”
This soul indeed perused the applicant’s birthday, and regarded me. “Uh, sir? I think we have everything we need here. You will not be asked again to provide your mother’s tax forms. Thank you, and have a nice day!”